Remember the lady who taught us how to give our pussies a rub down? She has returned and this time she’s brought a dog friend names Henry Wrinkler (!!!) with her. Yes, she’s teaching us how to mbuttage our dogs.
While watching this I started to take notes so that I can give my own dog a mbuttage later on, but then I thought to myself, “Why in anal gland hell should I mbuttage that ho?!” I mean, I already put food in his bowl every day. I even have to heat it up a little bit, because he likes it warm. AND I pick up his sh*t out in public while he secretly laughs at me. AND I’m even extra quiet in the morning while he’s sleeping so I won’t wake his lazy butt. AND now this lady is asking me to mbuttage him?!
Where is the video that teaches dogs how to mbuttage humans? I could use a mbuttage. Better yet, if my dog learned how to mbuttage people he could get licensed and then go out get himself a job. That way he could contribute to this household. Barking, burrowing and butt sniffing doesn’t pay the bills (Ryan Gaycrest doesn’t count).
And after all that ranting, you know I’ll be mbuttaging my dog’s head tonight while singing him rhymey songs. A sucker IS me.
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