Alpha Cougar
Sharon Stone better have carded that bitch before doing fuckey fuckey times with him. The last thing she needs is Chris Hansen bursting in on her while she’s pounding her cougar coochie into that child’s face.
Wait….maybe Cruella de Stone isn’t bumping no-no holes with this young bitch. Maybe, she’s planning to wear his ass! Animal fur isn’t good enough for her anymore, so now she’s going to wear baby ass skin. Poor dude doesn’t know it. He thinks he’s going to bone the Stone.
Morning Wood
Who wants some Booty Sweat? Pff! Been there, drank that - I’m Not Obsessed
Will Smith’s new school for budding aliens - A Socialite’s Life
Enrique Iglesias and Anna Kournikova used to be married - Celebitchy
David Beckham knows how to write - Holy Moly!
Barfness. John Mayer and Jenny Aniston are giving us too much information - SOW
Is Brit Brit bringing her mess act back to the VMAs? - ICYDK
DMX arrested for the fourth time in two months - Vh1 Blog
Robert Buckley is always shirtless and I don’t mind - Popbytes
Where’s Rumer?
Vanity Fair’s “Hollywood’s New Wave” issue is here and it should really be called the “You Are OLD” issue, because I have no idea who 25% of these skanks are. And where in fuckity fuck is Rumer?! Mommy Demi and Daddy Bruce couldn’t pull some strings to get their Tater Head in this issue? For shame!
At least I recognize the chicks on the cover. Amanda Seyfried, Emma Roberts, Blake Lively and Kristen Stewart are featured on the cover. Again, Tater Head definitely effed up by not getting her chin on the cover.
The rest of the issue includes Zoe Kravitz, The Jonas Hos, Jonah Hill and the twats from “Gossip Girl” who definitely recreated this “Friends” cast shot.
Visit Vanity Fair to read the article if you give an eff.
Total Tosh!
Mister Vadge left London this morning to join his wifey and kids in New York. Some say Guy is trying to save his shitty ass marriage to Madge. Madge probably promised Guy she’d give his nuts back if he traveled to NYC to pretend they are a happy couple.
Guy’s mommy is the only one to speak out against the divorce rumors. Lady Amber Leighton told the Telegraph, “There’s no conversation about divorce because there is no divorce. They are no different to most other couples and we all know that being together can be hard sometimes and marriages are not always a bed of roses. I’ll say it one more time, they are not getting divorced; the speculation is TT – that’s total tosh.“
Yes, Amber Leighton was the name of Madge’s character in that mega shit bomb “Swept Away.”
I think I’m in love with Lady Amber Leighton. You know she’s a chain smoker with a bouffant hairdo who drinks Crystal Light by the gallon. She has 15 cats named after precious gems like Ruby and Saphire. Here’s a picture of hot ass Lady Amber Leighton wearing her prized pepaw coyote fur hat!
David Archuleta Is So Pure
Seventeen Magazine asked American Idol’s resident fetus, David Archuleta, about his first kiss. David answered, “I haven’t had a first kiss.”
That makes sense. David probably doesn’t have hair “down there,” so he’s definitely not ready for his first kiss. And even though he’s 17, anybody that kisses David on the lips is a creepy child toucher.
Read the rest of David’s interview at ONTD. He also doesn’t like short skirts on girls! I think we found our new Gayken….
VIA Popwrap
James Bond Is Back
The teaser trailer for the new 007 movie is out. I always get this crap confused with Quantum Leap, so I half-expected Scott Bakula to pop into the trailer and was a little disappointed when he didn’t. Better yet, Ziggy should’ve been one of the Bond girls.
And why is Daniel Craig clothed through most of the trailer. More nekkid Craig and more Bond girls!! “Quantum of Solace” comes out this November.
Thanks Liam
Pot Calling Kettle WHOREY
Pornstar and overall haggard skank, Pamela Anderson, had this to say about Jessica Simpson during a radio interview in Australia:
“I think she is a bitch and whore. “
Obviously, Pamela has never looked in the mirror and has never googled her whorey bitch ass! Pamela’s kind word for Jessica were in response to Jessica wearing a “Real Girls Eat Meat” t-shirt. Peta’s #1 jack-off partner went on to say, “Actually, I don’t know if she was talking about food or men.”
There’s really only one way to settle this new feud: CAGE FIGHT! Nude cage fight with lots and lots of raw meat! And when I say “raw meat,” I’m not talking about Jess and Pammy’s coochies.
Source: The Sun
The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For June 27th!
Hello Olga, It’s Dimitri again, since you are not returning my calls, i thought i would send a pic to prove to you that i have a 5′ coc…um, cod. - Clarisse
Runners-up:
you might not believe it now, but her name is Ariel, and pretty soon she is gonna grow legs and we will live happily ever after. - WikkiDraven
“Damn, I guess his balls are bigger than mine after all.”
Not pictured: Disappointment. - CherryBlood420
Thanks Stacy
Hot Slut Of The Day!
Louie Spence - The gayest gay that ever gayed from the crap show known as “Celebrity Circus.” Louie is also a judge on the show. His out-of-control lisp is also a hot slut in its own right.
Birthday Sluts
Fantasia (24)
Michael Phelps (23)
Cheryl Cole (25)
Patrick Wolf (25)
Chan Ho Park (34)
Monica Potter (37)
Mike Tyson (42)
Bobby Vitale (43)
Vincent D’Onofrio (49)
David Alan Grier (53)
Lena Horne (91)